No one's exempt...and I know you've been there. Also please note that all of these incidents happened today, each child was an offender at least once, and it's not even 4 pm yet.
"Mommy, Mommy!!!! [offending child] poured gatorade all over the humidifier!"
Offending child in time out, jumping up and down while screaming, "I AM sitting quietly!!! I AM sitting quietly!!!" I turn to my oldest and ask, "Is it quiet in here?" and he looks around and immediately replies, "Yep, 'cept for [offending child]."
Offending child: "I threw my pencil and it landed on your desk and I made a scratch on it to show you exactly where it landed."
Me: "You scratched it on purpose just to show me?!"
Offending child, obviously rethinking confession a minute too late: "Um...yeah."
As I am typing the title of this blog, offending child is scrubbing crayon off the wall with baking soda, finishes, then comes to me and says, "I didn't need all of the baking soda so I just rubbed the extra on the floor." Oh, goody.